It is just about to be Thanksgiving and I have so much to be thankful for!
Recently, I have come to terms with my alcohol problem.
Yes, I have an alcohol problem. I havent been able to admit it to very many people, sometimes not even myself, but I have one.
It's really sad, because I used to be able to enjoy drinking and my husband enjoys to drink. And some of my friends like to drink!
Things have to change though. About 3/4 times I drink, I black out and spend hours vomiting.
I thought that I could start limiting myself to only drinking with dinner or just have two drinks, but I never stay with it.
I'm very thankful that my husband is so forgiving. I've told him the worst things you can ever say to your spouse and not remember a thing the next day. A few times he has spent hours taking care of me (while I curse at him the whole time) and then go to work without any sleep. And then he actually forgives me. As soon as I call to apoligize when I wake up, he's already forgiven me. He is amazing and way too gracious.
And I don't crave alcohol. I only drink now and again. But when I do drink, I usually cannot stop.
So, I've come to the decision that I can no longer drink. I'm going to go all of 2012 without a drink!! This will also help me to quit smoking, because I only smoke when I drink!
I will be so proud of myself if I can accomplish this.
What I am thankful for is such a supporting husband, family, and a few friends.
Don't judge me for the stuff I've admitted...
But if you do judge me for it, it's not my problem.
No comments:
Post a Comment